26 March 2021 – the last pills

I took my last chemo pills, what an anti climax – there was no champagne or bubbles, no party. It was actually depressing – I cried a lot – I expected something, a little get together in the garden even.

I beat cancer during Covid – I am angry how that will never be acknowledged, there is no badge of honour, no MBE, no certificate even to hang on the wall. The entire point of this survival jounrey is to go back to normal, but norma, is skewed, what with Covid and now having cancer taint my life directly. The last chemo doesn’t mean i’m safe, it mans i’m safe(ish) for now. I honestly started to think what the point of the last six months was. I’m trying to focus on things to look forward to, seeing my mates again, holidays, trips with Bertie, but i feel sad.

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